A little while back Aunt Keren’s car was stolen and Grace has been very concerned about whether they have found it yet. Donné was driving and asked Grace what she was doing, “I’m looking for Keren’s car,” she says looking out the window. When she sees a car that looks like Keren’s she asks, “Is that Keren’s car?” and every now and then asks, “Have they found Keren’s car yet?”

After a bath Grace stands wiggling her privates with her fingers and says, “Look mommy, I can wag my vagina.”

We use smacks as a consequence for certain behaviours, and do our best to follow a particular pattern when applying them. The one day I gave Grace a smack, which turned out to be a light one. She turns to me and says with a serious face and flat voice, “That smack meant nothing.”