Connection
The last few weeks have been difficult for me, my moms cancer has spread to her thyroid, I was diagnosed with glaucoma, our finances are in a scary space and Duncan is doing some exciting new work, but with a very tight deadline which has resulted in a more than usual tired, stressed out husband.
From the outside you wouldn’t know that I’m an emotional wreck (My emotional outbursts I keep for my kids and my husband). I chat, I smile, I check in with friends. I look whole and complete and yet I feel broken and raw.
What I have noticed in the past few weeks is how seldom someone actually stops and asks how I am. People ask about my mom, my kids, school, Duncan, general chit chat, but seldom a direct ‘how are you Donné?’
Today when a cashier at the shop asked me how I was and I nearly burst into tears, I realised how much I needed someone to just ask.
Don’t get me wrong I do have people in my life who do check in and who take interest in me, but I guess it made me pause and think, why was I craving that simple question.
So do I take a genuine interest in how the people in my life are doing? Do they know that I am there for them, a shoulder, an ear and everything else.
A friend posted this the other day, a good reminder to stop, reach out, and take the time to let our family, friends and even strangers know we care with a simple ‘how are you doing?’
I know that feeling and question all too well. I was diagnosed with glaucoma 4 years ago and Tristan gets checked every year now. Do you know what our problem is, people do ask, we just always respond “I am well and you?” We always divert the attention away from ourselves because we want to be strong. Nothing wrong with that, the people who really knows us, knows we are not fine…. love you my friend. Things gets too much for us but we will never show!!!
We will keep you in our prayers. Hope life will get brighter for you. Lots of love
Thank you for sharing your story. It’s true and I relate to being asked that question by a stranger and having a strong emotional response to it. Sometimes I think strong people are seldom checked in on. People come to believe that we are always strong. I think I also forget to let others know when I’m not.
You are facing some big challenges. Be kind to yourself. I will be praying for you. C x
Take care, Donne. You are such a genuinely beautiful soul. xxxx